Feeling the fear, and doing it anyway

 Finally, I took action!

As most regular readers will know I have been wanting to go back to Australia pretty much since I got back to the UK. Actually, that could even be before I got back as I was never really convinced I wanted to come. I wanted to spend time with my family, help my mum out with her parents, let my child get to know his extended family etc, but I really didn't want to live here ever again.

Then for the last couple of years, I have been saying I am going back, but worrying about it. Taking my son away from his family, being on our own, just him and me, what if one of my parents got sick, he will miss people, I will miss people. So I tried to find a better life here, and for a moment I thought maybe moving house would help, but then I realised it wouldn't. Incidentally, the last time I went to Australia I also nearly moved house instead, and I was interested in a house on the opposite side of the very same lake to where the one I nearly bought this time was. So history repeats itself.

I have been contemplating whether we should go for a visit or just take the plunge and do a one-way flight. Finally, I realised that the one-way flight is a tried and tested method - it has worked for me twice before, and there are always flights home if we need. If we do a test run and then decide to go back that's three flights instead of one, which is not only three times as much money, but also three times as long for a 4-year-old to sit on a plane!

I have been watching flight prices and they have been going up and up - at a rate of about £50 a week. I also reached a point where not going and then regretting it for a lifetime has actually become scarier than going. So last night I booked us one-way tickets to Brisbane.

I'm not really sure what will happen next. I might buy a car in Brisbane. It is supposed to be one of the cheapest places in Australia to buy a car. Our first port of call will be to see one of my best friends who is also an SMC, who lives on the  Sunshine Coast. Then if we have a car, I am thinking we will take a drive up the Queensland coast for a little way (fun) before heading west 2500km +  to Alice  (insane). From there it would be another 3500km + to Albany (totally stark raving bonkers!). It would be easier to fly, but seeing places along the way would be fun. I also feel that part of the journey is about getting a sense of how massive a country it is once again - I did use to drive 1200km to work sometimes but I have forgotten just how far that is. In a way, Albany is even more isolated than Alice as many of our friends are in the Eastern States - I feel like I really need to understand where we are before we settle. Plus if we have a car we can haul all our stuff around, get to places more easily, be less of a burden on our hosts, and I am thinking that perhaps the car will offer some form of comfort and familiarity to our journey, in the absence of having a home, and that might be good for BB.

Here's the route!

We could possibly take a shortcut along an unsealed road through the desert, missing out Adelaide, and knock almost 1000km off the journey. I would love to travel the Great Central Road at some stage in my life, but in the summer, alone with a 4-year-old might not be the best time to do that. Still, if we met some people that wanted to share the journey with us, and if we had an AWD, and the weather was not too crazily hot, and there hadn't recently been any rain, I guess we could...

Or we could fly. Which would be far more sensible...

Anyway - it feels good to have taken the plunge and purchased our tickets. The rest of the plan will unfold from here. It's the right choice I think. BB is excited. He wants to live somewhere sunny and he is happy for it to be the desert or the sea, but he wants to see his friend Gracie and says he will miss her if we don't live near her. I have tried to explain that we won't see people from here (his dad aunties, grandparents) and he just says we can send them messages and Skype them. I hope he takes to that as well he thinks he will!

Meanwhile, we have a lot to do, and a lot of stuff to get rid of, and stuff to store and stuff to pack, and a business to wind down, and a house to rent out... I'm liking it so far... Good to have a direction again.

Our flight is on 17th September. That's 169 days and counting!