tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post2770930299854292954..comments2023-07-04T19:32:36.368+08:00Comments on A Blissful Life: The decisionEmma Blisshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00929601119226414066noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-85408514351276750042013-11-01T08:45:22.595+08:002013-11-01T08:45:22.595+08:00Thanks Hilary. I think your probably right on the ...Thanks Hilary. I think your probably right on the fertility odds, and I know that's not great at 42, but actually I have been monitoring hormones etc for months (years) and all seems very normal. I am more concerned about my physical capabilities. Hopefully I'll get answers on that too.Emmahttp://www.ablissfullife.co.uk/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-17806531569623605832013-10-31T06:02:09.401+08:002013-10-31T06:02:09.401+08:00I for one am glad you're pursuing your desire ...I for one am glad you're pursuing your desire for a second child. I'm all about not ever allowing "what ifs" and this decision is really about you and your son, not anyone else. I would be prepared though that the clinic probably won't give you a yes or no answer on your fertility; most likely they will give you odds of success and you'll have to make a decision from there. I say go for it, though. At least you won't have to feel like you gave up your dream to please someone else!Hilary Alexandernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-69810525105376079242013-10-30T17:31:51.552+08:002013-10-30T17:31:51.552+08:00You're right in a way. I see it in stages too,...You're right in a way. I see it in stages too, but I think that having gone as far as going to a clinic and having all the tests etc and I was found to be OK, I would want to give it a try. I probably should't have mentioned it to DD at this stage though - perhaps honesty is not alway the best policy. But then if I had gone to the clinic and then spoke to him after he would probably be equally upset with me for not communicating, so that would have been hard too…Emmahttp://www.ablissfullife.co.uk/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-91310343339284988842013-10-30T15:19:35.957+08:002013-10-30T15:19:35.957+08:00I think you need to go to the clinic. I think you ...I think you need to go to the clinic. I think you also need to do this in steps. The first step is just to see if you 'can' get pregnant. I think that bit needs to be cleared up in your head first. If the answer to the first step is no, then it goes no further and you can then have closure on why you miscarried and that BB will be an adored only child with two wonderful families. If the answer to step one is yes, then you need to sit and think about step two. I think that DD probably feels a bit cornered at the moment because he's not seeing it in stages. This is primarily about closure or not for you hun. I know when we lost our last baby and that was five years ago now and I never, ever got pregnant again, I probably could have got closure and, for my mind, it would have been the best thing to do, however, instead, I just torture myself every month...daft really. I know soon I have to give up this game anyway, but I've buried my head in the sand and just 'hoped'. It won't work that way. Closure or knowledge is what you need here. xxxRachel Beenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-22460021154059575152013-10-30T14:38:20.989+08:002013-10-30T14:38:20.989+08:00Thanks Nell , yes it's definitely doable. Orig...Thanks Nell , yes it's definitely doable. Originally I planned to use an unknown donor for BB too, so it's something I've thought about a lot. Just hate to upset the balance of our nice little life, don't want to mess things up for BB! Fingers crossed!Emmahttp://www.ablissfullife.co.uk/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-37880698695399546722013-10-30T09:10:40.711+08:002013-10-30T09:10:40.711+08:00I am definitely supportive of exploring your optio...I am definitely supportive of exploring your options. While it might be more difficult if the second child is not DD's, it's still doable. Through the message boards, I used to "know" a number of women who had on child in a relationship and then chose to have another on their own. You have to do what is right for you not for DD & PP.Nellhttp://Nellskatingontheedge.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-12384075180525554142013-10-30T06:05:20.428+08:002013-10-30T06:05:20.428+08:00Thanks Kaz Thanks Kaz Emmahttp://www.ablissfullife.co.uk/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7592839731639120187.post-51762209505975231842013-10-30T05:54:12.754+08:002013-10-30T05:54:12.754+08:00I think it's great that you are at least explo...I think it's great that you are at least exploring your options. Just keep focusing on that your wants and wishes are just as important as everyone else's. A bit of anguish now is far better than the 'what if's' in the future. I wish you all the best.Kaz Bubba Babblenoreply@blogger.com