Maybe its not a baby I want, but a new sofa.
I first had this thought a couple of weeks ago. We were staying in an enormous holiday home with my folks and I was laying on the most comfortable three seater sofa, reading. Suddenly a thought popped into my head "If I can't have a baby, maybe I'll get a new sofa!". I chastised myself for even comparing the idea of a baby with a sofa - how could I even think that way. But when I got home I sat on my own sofa and had the thought again, I actually started googling!
My lounge suite is not the best. I bought the whole lot for £70 from a charity shop when I first got the house, and then spent the same amount on 'sofa savers' to stop you from sinking right through them to the floor. It's a good colour though - a rich orange, reminds me of the Simpson Desert and brings a little warmth into my home. Its great that I don't care what BB spills on it, but it's old and smelly and not all that comfortable either.
The thought of a new sofa keeps coming back. I even confessed it to DD when he was last here. It's hard to ascertain whether I am being practical, or if it is just my brain's clever way of protecting me from the fact that the results of the fertility tests might come back against me. I am finding it so hard to know what I really think. I went for the scan and blood tests last Friday, and I get the results in a couple of weeks time. Reality is though, despite what I first thought, with all the added costs, I can't really afford IVF. IUI probably won't be advised at my age, and could just be money down the drain. Maybe I should just forget the whole idea and move on.
|Red Leather sofa (image taken from here)|
Aaaaarghhhh! Roll on two weeks time.