My favourite development with BB in the last week has been his use of the word "gorgeous". It sounds so cute when he says it. It is also part of that evolutionary survival strategy, as I did have one morning in the last week when he climbed on my head, hugged me and said "aaaahhh, gorgeous" at 5.15am!!!
Despite the fun we have been having, I also spent much of my day today having a little internal dialogue with myself about what I am eating these days. Since the whole 30 I have discovered that both wheat and dairy totally sap my energy. However, although I have been avoiding them most of the time there is this little thing in my head that is trying to convince me that it's OK really, just a little here and there is fine. The thing is I am not very good at just a little. Nor is it fine. I feel tired, less happy, a bit more vague, don't exercise, am less productive and less efficient.
Yesterday was perhaps my worst day yet. I bought a pastry as I was expecting guests, and then I ate some. For tea I ate mashed potato with butter and milk, and the in the evening I had a vodka lime and soda. I woke up feeling tired even after 7 hours sleep with no interruption from BB. I can't really pin point what made me feel tired - I am guessing a combination of the three.
To be honest I am totally sick of thinking about what I eat and how it makes me feel. The whole 30 really has had an impact on what and how I eat. On the days between the bad bits I have gone back to an almost whole 30 diet, as it is easy and I know I feel better on it. I haven't really eaten too much bad stuff - I am not snacking between meals and I haven't eaten sweets. I have had quite a bit of dark chocolate though! And I discovered paleo brownies and paleo pancakes!
I am sick of trying new foods and then analysing how I feel. I still haven't tried any grains other than rice and corn, or any legumes. I feel I need to get back to how I was feeling at the end of the whole 30 to truly know how they affect me. Then I find myself thinking that it's just easier to do whole 30 all the time and be done with it - I know it works for me! It's just hard when you are out, it would be good to know what risks I can take...
I was catching up with a few blogs that I read tonight and I saw that Tiffany and Kristen are both doing a whole30 again for June. I am going to join in the fun, but I'm going to do it a bit differently to before, to address my current needs.
What I need is a consistent and manageable way of eating that makes me feel good. To be honest the weight loss has taken a bit of a back seat, how I feel is much more important to me right now - though I do really need to lose 10kg or more. I believe weight loss will happen, if I feel better and have more energy to do things I will be more active. By the end of the whole 30 last time, I was exercising every day, because I felt I needed to. Since reintroducing dairy and having such huge energy slumps I haven't been on the Wii at all! I want to get to the point where I am exercising in some form or another every day!
One thing that is a bit inhibiting for me is the cost of the whole 30. Eating organic all the time just isn't feasible on my budget. I need to find a way of eating well, in a whole 30 informed style, but without it costing me the earth. It really needs to be something I can maintain beyond the 30 days. Leslie has describes this a Whole Life - I am going to try and be that commited!
I also need to drink more water.
I dont want to blog about it every day this time - that took quite a bit of effort and also took over my blog. Having to produce images of what I was eating did really help me though. Sad as it may sound, I needed that accountability sometimes to keep me on track. I am going to take photos this time, for the same reason, but I'll use instagram instead, as suggested by Jess.
I have just taken a few measurements as a starting point and I am really happy to report that I weigh the same and have the same waist measurement as I did when I finished the whole 30. That is 78.5kg and 93cm.
So - in summary the goals are.
- drink water (minimum 1.5 litres per day)
- exercise daily (for at least 30 mins - a long walk with the buggy is acceptable for a few days, but do some "me time" exercise too)
- whole30 style meals but not everything organic - more of a budget version
- photographs on Instagram of every meal - to make me do it properly
- find a way to make this work long term
OK - Whole 30 June / Whole Life starts here!
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